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Monday, June 20, 2011

I can finally play Magic again!

YES THEY'RE BANNED.  Ehem.  Sorry.  I'm just a little crazy from hearing jubilant choruses of angels singing in my brain ever since I heard the news that Jace, the Mind Sculptor and Stoneforge Mystic have been banned from Standard play in Magic:  The Gathering. 

Why am I so excited about this to the point that I might be going crazy?  Because I haven't played Friday Night Magic for months.  Why?  Because everybody had effing Jace, the Mind Sculptor, or a stupid Caw-blade deck, and I was tired of it.  The notion that everyone plays the same decks now just kills what I like about the game--creativity.  I've had to deal with Jace's stupid face for almost a whole year.

I bet you're pissed you spent $100 on this now.

It wasn't so bad at first.  Jace was crazy expensive, so there were still many people not playing him.  I could deal with the 3 boring JMS decks during Friday nights.

And then came the Scars of Mirrodin block.  Fuck.

Trolls everywhere began rubbing their chins whilst looking at the poorly underrated Stoneforge Mystic and exclaiming, "Aha, wizards!  We've got you!  You have now given us something to tutor!  Meemeemeeeh!"  And, really, getting Argentum armor out on turn 3 is kind of terrifying, especially if you had a Kor Outfitter handy to equip it on turn 4.  It didn't happen all the time, so it was all right.
 I hate you.

Okay, so standard was getting pretty annoying about now.  Just about everyone had some sort of Stoneforge Mystic deck or a deck with Jace-face.  Kuldotha Red was getting annoying, too, but that stopped for whatever reason.  

Probably because of this.

Batterskull.  Seriously, fuck you.  Now all the Caw-blade idiots had yet another nice shiny to tutor out on the cheap.  I was worried Puresteel Paladin would only make matters worse, but that's what's really infuriating about Caw-Blade decks--they weren't equipment decks.  Their sole purpose was to get out one of their two fancy equipment cards with Stoneforge Mystic and then beat you to death with it equipped to a silly bird.  And it worked, because all their other cards were to prevent you from doing anything about it, Jace included.  Creativity?  Yeah, dead.

And why is creativity dead?  The internet, and people who don't play the game for fun.  The internet allows deck lists to be shared with the whole world, and greedy bastards who just want to win money eat that shit up and all make the "winning" deck.  I don't think I've seen a creative deck ever since Scars of Mirrodin came out.  Thankfully, Wizards have noticed and have expressed that they desire the game to be what it once was.

So I'm extremely excited, because now I can play Magic again and not feel my soul die as I play ten people with the same deck.


  1. Batterskull is currently running $25. Just sayin'.

    I tried to see what I could do with your "challenge" on creating an interesting deck, and these are the two I came up with. I don't think they're that creative, but you might think differently:

    I play Magic for fun, and I hate Jace with a fiery passion.

  2. Ooh, a lifegain deck! With pretty things in it! :P And while these decks may not be "creative," they're certainly more interesting to play than Cawblade deck variant #3450 or Blue-deck-with-four-Jaces #2348. Maybe I'm just a blue-hater.

    Also, Trollandtoad has Batterskull down to $17.99 already! Stoneforge is back to $8 and Whatshisface is down to $60. Yesss.

  3. I don't even play magic and reading Jace, sounds like a bitch. Glad you can go back to playing magic again.

  4. Oh, he is such a bitch. And, even though he was $100, everyone seemed to have him.